Global War on Idiocy

It’s official! The commonly accepted term ’Global War on Terror’ has been retooled and replaced by the catchier, more affirmative ‘Global Struggle on Extremism’. It seems the Bush administration feels that the old slogan has worn out its usefulness, because it focused solely, and incorrectly, on the military campaign.

Pfft! YEAH! Do ya think? There’s people blowing up subway stations and flying planes into buildings – that sounds like a fucking military campaign to me! A “struggle” just seems more, well, accepting. You struggle with your weight, alcohol, paying bills, or the urge to jump the neighbor’s wife – you don’t struggle against TERRORISM!

Who’s writing Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld’s press releases – Tony Hawk?

Gen. Richard B. Myers, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, told the National Press Club on Monday that he had "objected to the use of the term 'war on terrorism' before, because if you call it a war, then you think of people in uniform as being the solution."

Again. WTF?

Isn’t that what the “people in uniform” are trained and paid to do in the first fucking place? Is this guy really suggesting that I shouldn’t think of the recent terrorist attacks as a war unless I’m ready to go into the streets myself and help hunt down those evil bastards with my pocketknife?

Gen. Myers continued that although the military is heavily engaged in the mission now, he said, future efforts require "all instruments of our national power, all instruments of the international communities' national power." The solution is "more diplomatic, more economic, more political than it is military," he concluded.

Look, dipshit. Call it whatever the fuck you want to, nobody cares, just quit dissecting it and making excuses and get out there and kick us some fucking terrorist ass!

Ludicrous.