Color Me Stupid
I can’t stand guys who get their hair highlighted.
It’s freakin’ bad enough that the streaked hair look is popular among trendy females making most women appear like striped gazelle’s grazing on an African plain; but on men, this look is about as scary at James Gandolfini in a flesh-toned body stocking.
It just looks like shit any way you dye it. It’s practically impossible in my opinion for men to ever look cool with those faggy blonde highlights on the top of their heads. They look like they have a birds nest built on top of their noggin, or they’re groupies on the recent ‘Flock of Seaguls’ revival tour.
Technology just hasn’t advanced to the point to make male highlights look reasonably natural looking. We can design and build a laser beam that could scratch our ass from outer space, but we can’t make highlighting men’s hair look anything less than fucking Pussius Maximus.
What are these retards thinking? Don’t they ever look in the mirror afterwards and realize they look like a Daisy Mae McTinklepants? Just seeing a group of guys out together with the same nightmare highlight haircut leaves such a bad taste in my mouth that I have to make an appointment with a gastroenterologist the next day.
Unfortunately, this faux pas fashion pour homme is fucking everywhere! This could be the most recognized hideous natural cultural phenomenon since Bat Boy first graced the pages of the ‘Weekly World News’.
It should be made into a law:
“Men are forbidden to streak, tint, shade, dye, or otherwise color their natural hair color with blonde highlights. All offenders will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law by a jury of his real manly peers, and immediately punishable by judgment of Thunderdome."
It’s freakin’ bad enough that the streaked hair look is popular among trendy females making most women appear like striped gazelle’s grazing on an African plain; but on men, this look is about as scary at James Gandolfini in a flesh-toned body stocking.
It just looks like shit any way you dye it. It’s practically impossible in my opinion for men to ever look cool with those faggy blonde highlights on the top of their heads. They look like they have a birds nest built on top of their noggin, or they’re groupies on the recent ‘Flock of Seaguls’ revival tour.
Technology just hasn’t advanced to the point to make male highlights look reasonably natural looking. We can design and build a laser beam that could scratch our ass from outer space, but we can’t make highlighting men’s hair look anything less than fucking Pussius Maximus.
What are these retards thinking? Don’t they ever look in the mirror afterwards and realize they look like a Daisy Mae McTinklepants? Just seeing a group of guys out together with the same nightmare highlight haircut leaves such a bad taste in my mouth that I have to make an appointment with a gastroenterologist the next day.
Unfortunately, this faux pas fashion pour homme is fucking everywhere! This could be the most recognized hideous natural cultural phenomenon since Bat Boy first graced the pages of the ‘Weekly World News’.
It should be made into a law:
“Men are forbidden to streak, tint, shade, dye, or otherwise color their natural hair color with blonde highlights. All offenders will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law by a jury of his real manly peers, and immediately punishable by judgment of Thunderdome."
posted by crazytigerrabbitman at
5:47 PM
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