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Thursday, February 09, 2006

Brokeback Moaning

Is there anybody else out there that totally doesn't give a shit about ever seeing the critically aclaimed movie 'Brokeback Mountain'?

I'm already sick and tired of what seems like everyone telling me about what an incredibly amazing and sad story it is. Well, duh! No shit, Sherlock. The thing is, in my current state of permanent single loser status, I'm not too eager to just run out and proceed to make myself all sad and depressed by viewing a movie about the forbidden man love between two lonely ranch hands. Excuse me, but that just doesn't sound like an ideal Saturday night for me - what can I say? I'm likely to end up experiencing some sort of bizarre Stockholm Syndrome and wind up purchasing a pair of leather chaps and going on vacation to some 'Men Only' Dude Ranch.

Plus, it really annoys me how everyone feels that they have to articulate to me about how incredibly sad the ending of the movie is. I'm a little insulted here! It's a movie about two gay cowboys - how fucking happy could it really be? Think about it: how many cheerful cowboy songs have you heard in the last 30 - 40 years? Cowboys, even the straight, studly ones, are still a pretty fucking depessing bunch. The fact that these two particular cowboys in 'Brokeback Mountain' are homosexual is just the icing sugar on the puff pastry.

I simply can't picture a happy movie about gay cowboys and their secret desires for hot man ass out on the lonesome prairie. I just don't really need to see this movie to already know how it's all going to turn out in the end (no pun intended).

Likewise, I probably won't be bothered to go see the sequel, 'Fag Hill', either.

2 Comments:

  • I rarely laugh out loud while reading, however I did it like 3 times while reading this. Bravo! Now how about a movie about forbidden love between male nurses? Do I smell Oscar? (And I may or may not be referring to the award)

    By Blogger Rick, at 9:02 PM  

  • Don't let your loneliness preclude your enjoyment of a little ranch hand man love.... you never know, it might open up a whole new world for you!

    Oh, ye gods - my word verification is "qutayeww" - ha!!!! Your reaction exactly!

    - M

    By Blogger Marcheline, at 11:54 AM  

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