Human Chew Toy

So, I'm sitting here with my bowl of chilled grapes and reading the comments left from my legions of loyal blog readers, whom I affectionately refer to as ‘Tofutards’ (all three or four of you) and suddenly, I have a cat gnawing on my right hand. Not a nibbling, or a "love biting" exactly...but a real gnawing.

Now it doesn't hurt all, nor is he doing any damage - but Miso is totally into chewing on my right hand at the moment. I feel like a fucking chew toy.

An hour or so ago I scrubbed out my porcelain kitchen sink with bleach and that particular scrubbing hand still has a weak smell of disinfectant on it despite being washed thoroughly. Once he got one whiff of this bleachy smell, he got all worked up and is making some serious effort to lick, chew, and gnaw at the fingers and palm of my right hand.

That's weird, right?

Now I've watched him lick plastic shopping bags and just about every leaf and stem on every plant in my patio garden, but I've NEVER seen him so fixated on chewing on something as he is with my right hand at the moment. You'd think I was made out of tuna or something.

WTF?

My cat is such a spaz. So now, besides his ongoing war with the neighborhood raccoons I will have to confront the fact that my junkie cat also huffs bleach. Why can't he just mow down katnip and sprawl out on the floor in a furry puddle like most other cats?