Compost Crack-Up

My neighbors have seen fit to start recycling.

Good for them.

Now where you may at first applaud their environment efforts to Reduce, Reuse, and Recycle, one would also have to wonder why they also saw fit to position their plastic Recycling composter right dab square in the middle of their front yard. How pretty is that?

I can deal with the rest of the discarded wooden skids, rusted furniture, dismantled car parts, tangled Christmas lights, broken and deflated toys, as well as every other conceivable piece of assorted useless trash and crap, but please, I have to put my foot down about rotting waste.

There are times as it is that I have to resist the urge to run next door and make trash angels in their front yard just for fun. And now the whole centerpiece piece d’resistance is a large, mildewed, plastic composter. It’s enough to stop the heart of any avid Feng shui practitioner.

Most civilized earth-conscious planet dwellers choose to conveniently stash away their composters in less conspicuous places like the back corner of the yard, or behind the tool shed.

But my neighbors?

Oh no. They’d rather walk out the front door of their house each day and simply pitch their biodegradable material for two points from the porch.

How classy is that?

It’s like living next door to ‘Sanford & Son’.