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Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Fashion Farse

Why are women so obsesseed with fashion?

Lets face it, any woman at my office place could come to work wearing a green Glad garbage bag done up with an old piece of home extension cord, and she’d still be guaranteed to at least have half the male co-workers around her still willing to slip her Mr. Chubbers if given the chance. Men however; ANY deviation from the set fashionable norm and we’d be instantly marked by our peers as a circus freak.

Fashion is not so forgiving on single men. We are not automatically pleasing to the eye like our prettied-up female and homosexual counterparts. Shit if we were, do you think that we’d still have popular television programs called ‘Queer Eye for the Straight Guy’? No, I think not!

We are scrutinized, criticized, and ultimately ostracized if we present ourselves dressed in anything else other than what’s on the front cover of GQ magazine that month. Women have much more leeway to express themselves openly and publicly on a more grandiose personal level. How else would you explain people paying thousands of dollars for seats to see some waifish thin supermodel strut down a ramped runway decked out in something that looks like it was designed by ‘Black & Decker’, as opposed to some world reknown fashion designer?

Men are not so open, experimental or expressive with each other or the world around us when it comes to fashionable style. We do not approve of deviating from the set fashionable norm. Our poor, creatively stunted, ill-equipped male minds are not capable to process, accept or appreciate such flagrant changes and disregard for the approved Men’s Fashion…except of course when it comes to women. Then we’re completely open-minded depending on what our chances are of “getting lucky” later on. Just as long as that option is still a viable one, she can wear a dress made out of bottle caps stuccoed to her fat, sweaty, naked body for all we care!


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