The "Kitty Dish"

For Christmas this year, my landlord gave me among other things, a white crystal kitty-face dish. “Oh, fucking goodie!”

What kind of fucking guy gives another guy a crystal kitty-face dish? It’s not moral, it’s not decent, it’s not natural, and it sure isn’t fucking manly is it? Not unless we were same sex partners named Emilio and Carson remodeling our home together or something anyways. Even my cat thinks it's faggy looking!

What, you invested serious thought into what would be considered as an appropriate and sensible gift...something to be enjoyed and treasured….and you decide on a white-fucking-crystal “kitty dish”? WTF?

Let’s just say that the “kitty dish” isn’t likely to see the light of day very often unless I happen to ever play host to a group of Polish grandmothers or the ‘League of Gay Nations’ or something.

I will never speak of the “kitty dish” again.